Useful Tips

How to handle moving in very, very difficult times


Transplanting flowers from a smaller flowerpot to a larger one, providing them with much better conditions, each time I noticed that the flowers immediately after transplantation lowered their heads, stunted, were sick, and only after a while took root and grew further. Not all flowers survived their transplant.

This experience prompted the thought of how difficult it is for people to relocate and relocate. This is a very difficult and crucial stage in human life. It can be planned, prepared or sudden, unexpected, caused by circumstances.

I myself experienced more than 5 years ago moving to another city and another country, because what I write is verified by my own experience.

It’s not easy to settle in a new place. It seems that nothing terrible happened, but it didn’t become close to the environment that has been forming over the years: family, friends, acquaintances, relatives, classmates, classmates, colleagues, neighbors, work, hobbies, habitual way of life. Living close by, it was possible not to meet for years, but the knowledge warmed that they were always potentially nearby, this knowledge gave a state of confidence and security.

It can also be difficult to leave your home, comfort and familiar atmosphere, this comfort zone created over the years.

In a new place, all fears and complexes are aggravated, often a feeling of loneliness and uselessness haunts. Support is especially important at this point. But all it takes is time for the sprouts to be rooted in a new place, create a new circle of contacts, find a job.

When moving, as with any purpose, motivation is important, for which you decided to change your place of residence. When the motivation is high, then everything develops in the best way, there is a huge visible and invisible support. As soon as something does not work out, as a rule, it is enough to restore motivation, to realize holistically why you moved, to give yourself time, not to allow fears to control you.

For the first time, a dichotomy often arises in a new place. Your body is already here in a new place, and your soul still often returns to the old place. The move has already been completed, the main thing is to be holistically aware of what you are here for. The main motive for moving related to the preservation of life and health may be forgotten, and more and more often regrets arise about the abandoned house, friends, beloved people, things, and activities.

Each time in such situations, a reassessment of values ​​and a holistic perception of the prevailing circumstances are important, not to allow little things to block a more important value. All that you had, you yourself created, and, therefore, this is your resource, which is in a new place with you. Recognizing the value of their health, holistically accepting with thanks a new place, new opportunities always open up.

The transition period should simply be taken for granted and its duration determined. You pulled yourself out of your native land, in a new place you still need to take root. We’ll have to change some habits, refuse to compare, as it was there and it became here, to be ready for any work in a new place.

When you correctly accept the circumstances of your life, are holistic in your choice, then, as a rule, a new habitat, work, friends, acquaintances, neighbors are formed quite quickly. Transforming super-love-super-dependence on everything that was in a past life, the field of love is leveled, and a new space is already harmoniously formed.

I have many friends changed their place of residence. As a rule, for those who managed to accept a new place with gratitude, everything left in the past is multiplied handsomely: instead of a 3-room apartment, a 3-storey private house appears, new high positions, own businesses, good cars, a much higher income level .

It’s not possible to get accustomed to those who live in the past all the time, driving themselves into a vicious circle: regretting the past, the new does not come, while regret is even more amplified, which does not help the situation.

At such moments of nostalgia for the past, there is always the opportunity to reflect on what else I can do in my new place. As a rule, nostalgia occurs when there is a feeling of dissatisfaction with oneself.

Holistically accepting the situation, returning to the moment “here and now”, consciously shaping your motivation (for what?), Constantly maintaining a competent hierarchy of values, with gratitude to a new place, new opportunities always open that you did not even think about and did not allow imagine yourself in an old place.

Moving is a difficult stage of life, it opens up new resources, gives huge development, and the result is always happy as a gift for development. When you competently accept difficulties and thank a new place, your new resources become much larger, which is rewarded with new material goods.

Having settled in a new place during the transitional period, the longing for close people also leaves. They have not gone anywhere. As before, you did not always see each other often, you are again pleased with the very fact of their existence, the Internet helps to communicate more often than before, the circle of close people expands in the literal and figurative sense.

I would like to wish everyone who has moved or is just planning to move, new friends, acquaintances, new discoveries and opportunities, to gratefully look to the future, seeing new opportunities and prospects for their development with a creative dream for the benefit of others.

Ask for help

If the apartment of a deceased relative is full of familiar things that you want to cry at a glance, but you understand that you actually do not need them, call your neighbors and friends for help - they are not so sensitive and their radio can do a good job. Ask them to help you sort and pack your wardrobe, books and utensils. These boxes can then be donated to charity without unpacking, and this is the right decision. Feel free to ask for help, in fact everyone will only be happy to do something useful instead of just watching how you feel. At such moments, people often do not know how they can help - but this does not mean at all that they do not want to.

Take the most significant

Usually, when people move, they get rid of excess, but if you are already in discord, things dear to your heart will allow you to feel a little calmer and more confident. And they do not have to be functional. My beloved grandmother’s cup with a broken handle, a lamp found at a flea market for your apartment with your (former) husband, a doormat who made the bedroom with a view of the Kremlin so cozy — take everything that is of special importance to you personally.

Limit unpleasant communication

Instead of asking lazy and arrogant aunts from the store for packing boxes, buy a whole pack of large, durable plastic bags, like those from Ikea, or the striped trunks that market dealers love so much. They are more convenient and smart, and their bottom will not break at the most inopportune moment.

Instead of the indifferent movers who will be five hours late and then kill half the dishes, you can hire a friend with a car and a couple of friends with developed muscles. If it is possible to avoid nervous communication with strangers and unpleasant people - avoid it.

Say goodbye

Before you leave the house that meant so much to you, let yourself say goodbye to it - have a party (do not forget to invite everyone who helped you), take a walk around the neighborhood. This will help you to tune in to changes and relieve you of the feeling that you were torn from an established life, like a carrot from a garden.

Moving Safety

1) Before buying, and therefore, before moving to a new apartment, house, first carefully ask, find out who and how lived in it, whether there was an abundance of negativity, misfortune, trouble, quarrels, scandals, etc. Ask yourself: for what reasons , former tenants selling a house, apartment? And if the reasons turn out to be quite sad and negative, refuse to buy this property. Also, make sure that close to your home there are no such negative objects as: a hospital, cemetery, power transmission towers, entertainment facilities in the form of a restaurant, bathhouse or night club, etc. If the apartment or house, new or former households were happy here and selling a house because they are moving to a new one, bigger and more expensive, or leaving for permanent residence abroad, you can safely buy and live in this housing.
2) One of the main mistakes that people make when moving is that they stop caring about their old housing, long before the move. This is fundamentally wrong! The fact is that after starting to feel bad (indifferent) to the old (old) house, the residents stop repairing leaking taps or gluing lagging wallpapers, which is why this is bad:
a) For your energy sector, it is harmful to stop caring for an apartment that has served you faithfully for many years. After all, she can “take offense” (as Feng Shui claims) and (even before your move), begin to generate negative energy. Better thank your house, fix what is possible and the energy of the house and yours will become brighter and kinder.
b) Another reason: you don’t repair and maybe you don’t even clean the old house (after all, the move is coming soon!) as a result of this, you only have negative thoughts (everything old. broken. old taps flow.) as a result, you are all negative and thoughts and energy, automatically transfer to a new house, a new apartment, a new life - all the chain reaction has gone. And if you had cleaned and repaired everything, then the energy of positive would be all around, and it is possible that the new owners, of your old apartment, would be grateful to you, which would again add positive to the world to you too. And when you move, you would take with you only positive moods, energies, vibrations. The saying: "After us, even the flood!" - This is antifeng shui.
c) Well, you understand. Before moving, be sure to put things in order in the old (former) housing, do not spare a little time and effort, and honestly, you will not regret: in your life there will be more and more positive, happiness, prosperity!
3) Before moving, be sure to go over all your things and get rid of old, broken (bark can no longer be repaired), obsolete things, objects. It’s best to dump all the junk, it’s clear that it’s impossible to throw away all the old things, and to buy new ones in a new apartment, and we don’t call for it. But! If possible, take as little as possible old, old things into a new apartment, into a new life, so as not to attract old, old troubles in a new life. If it is very difficult for you to part with things that you should throw away, try this technique: while disassembling things, imagine yourself a big lizard (mentally, of course), a lizard with a long, long tail. So, all the old things (mentally), its tail plunged. Loaded? All the old stuff? Fine! Now imagine how you forcefully drop your tail (as lizards do in nature). Everything! Your tail, with all its junk, has disappeared into the fog. of the past. Well, now imagine that you have lizards, a new tail is growing rapidly (better than the previous one!) Onto which you put (again mentally) all the things that you take to a new apartment and you can still imagine new things that you are going to buy or about dreaming. Folded, loaded ?! Well done! And now, the most important thing: imagine that you, with your new tail (and everything that is loaded on it!), Find yourself in your new house or apartment. Carefully and carefully, mentally unload your things from the tail and, if possible, even arrange them in their intended places. All mental (mental) relocation took place! Be sure to praise yourself! Yes, and do not forget to mentally turn back into a person: happy, cheerful, abundant, healthy and rich!

We carry out the move itself.

1) Well, let's get started! The most important thing is to decide on the day of the move. Feng Shui advises: the period of the new moon and the full moon, these are the most favorable days for the beginning of a new life, in a new place. And what day in this period, choose for yourself, let your intuition tell you.
2) The next stage, you already got rid of old, unnecessary, broken things? Put everything neatly in large boxes, if necessary, transfer fragile and fragile objects with newspaper, paper, polystyrene foam or other packing material. When packing and folding things, think only about good things, remember with gratitude how you lived in this house, how you used the things you are packing now. With such good thoughts, you pay tribute, former housing, to the positive atmosphere for the new owners of your old housing and at the same time let into your new life in the new house, only everything good, positive, happy. You can also write down with a pen in a notebook what you take from the past to new housing: happiness, positive, prosperity, positive emotions, joy, prosperity, etc.
3) So: all things are collected, loaded into the car and transported. Before you start moving things from the car to a new apartment, first take a kitten or an adult cat in your hands and without crossing the threshold, run the animal into the apartment. This is more an ancient tradition than a ritual, so if you don’t have a cat and there’s nowhere to get a kitten, and you want to observe the ritual, do not despair, there are two ways out of this situation, though humorous and funny: for example, you can buy (first of course) , a small, soft kitten toy. And just throw the toy over the threshold. That's all. Or you can imagine yourself as a cat or a cat, cross the threshold and mew for your pleasure, walk around the apartment, meowing in every corner, then go back to the threshold, become yourself again and cross the threshold again, already as the owner. Well, the mood is created, the positive has gone, now you can slowly drag things.
4) Well, things are dragged and stacked in the rooms. And now before you start unpacking things, do a number of necessary and important actions:
a) First of all, open all the windows, ventilate the new room: if it isn’t winter outside, open the windows wide for at least half an hour, if it’s cold, open the window for a few minutes, this will be enough to let the fresh air positive change.
b) Then open all the taps in the kitchen and in the bathroom for a couple of minutes: this will also refresh the energy flows, attract positive Chi energy.
c) Re-wipe all horizontal surfaces in the apartment from dust, and then it is advisable to wash all floors.
d) Next, make any rial, in accordance with your faith, tradition (for example: pray, smoke a room with a Chinese incense stick, walk around the perimeter of the whole apartment with a lit candle.) By such actions, you let the Subtle Worlds, the Universe know that you are in this the apartment (house) is the owner.
e) The next step: cook on the stove, in the oven, food, something simple: porridge, scrambled eggs, make coffee or tea, and enjoy a meal, the first in your new home. This will further strengthen the energy bond.
5) That's it, the move took place! Congratulations! You have moved! Well, now we unpack and put things in their places. And two more points:
* After moving, it is advisable to spend the first night in a new apartment, so you will further strengthen your role as a host.
* And at the end of the article, there’s another piece of advice: throughout your life in this housing, coming home after work or a walk, always remember to say such words: “Hello my magnificent home!” Or “Hello my favorite apartment!” Well or what Something like that. And your home will bring you only positive impressions, rest for the soul and body, creative powers and many other benefits.

Release in advance

The fact that the child leaves to study in another city or marries / marries and moves will not be a secret for anyone. And to make it easier for you to let him go into adulthood, you need to do this long before you, as you grow up, pack your bags and fly out of the nest. Parents are less worried about an independent child who will cook and wash food and earn money. Therefore, so that in the distant future you would not be scared for your son or daughter, teach them independence in advance, without taking on their responsibilities and do not overly guardianship.

Believe in the success of the child

Often the parents feel depressed because of fear for the future of the child, because he is "still small", "inexperienced", "reckless", "what if something happens to him." To overcome these fears and experiences, use a very simple technique - look at your child and imagine him successful and happy, in full detail.

So you, letting him go, you will be convinced that everything will turn out well with him. Realize that if you worry, even carefully hiding it, your anxiety will be transmitted to him, which will create insecurity in yourself and your strengths.

Find the lost emotion

To fill the feeling of emptiness that arises when children leave their families, ask yourself the question: “What am I missing?” - and yourself honestly answer it. If you realize that you are suffering from a “brooding instinct” and you need to constantly take care of someone, switch to someone else. This “someone” can be elderly parents, a pet or children from dysfunctional families. Осознав, какой именно эмоции вам стало не хватать, вы быстрее сможете ее найти в другом деле и заполнить образовавшуюся пустоту.

Установите график свиданий

Справиться с одиночеством будет намного проще, если вы сможете договориться о "семейных днях". Причем лучше, чтобы встречи всей семьи проходили в родительском доме. Так вы сможете снова вернуться в то время, когда все домочадцы жили вместе. And preparing for the arrival of children will take your time and thoughts and give a lot of positive emotions.

Let the arrival of children become a certain ritual with its own traditions. But at the same time, it is very important that the invitation of children to visit was accompanied not by an appeal to guilt “for leaving”, but by their voluntary desire to return to their father’s house, because it is warm, cozy and “smells of childhood”. And in order for this to be true, it is necessary to create a favorable climate and establish trust between all members of the family.

And most importantly, if on some appointed day the younger family members cannot come to you, always have a backup option. So you do not feel abandoned and do not spoil your relations with the children because of offense, accusing them of exchanging a day off with you for “party with friends”.

Learn to lead yourself

The reason for the deterioration of the emotional state after the children leave is often the lack of a “subordinate,” because now there is no one to check, issue orders and control. Having left the walls of his native home, the child becomes completely independent, and it becomes extremely difficult for parents to tell what he needs to do, how to behave and who he owes.

To fill the need for someone to lead, careful planning of your life will help. To do this, make a daily schedule of your day and week. A prerequisite is to strictly follow the schedule. Do not be upset if at first you have a real day will not coincide with the one that is painted in the diary. You will certainly succeed in keeping up with your plans no later than 21 days later - just as much is needed for any habit to take hold.

Author: Anastasia Stesenko