We find out what femininity is and whether it is possible to educate it in yourself
Talking about femininity is about as difficult as describing music or painting - it is perceived by us at the level of sensations, emotions, but it is difficult to define. It is not so easy to explain in a nutshell exactly how a feminine girl differs from a non-feminine one - with a length of legs, hair color and a shade of lipstick, this mysterious parameter has little in common, as well as erudition or IQ. Men, upon request to decipher the concept of femininity, also give out various characteristics: softness, tenderness, harmony, attractiveness, charm, calmness. The elusive combination of all these qualities creates an aura around a woman, a special energy field, which is called femininity.
Oscar de la Renta dress, earrings, bracelets, everything - RL Jewel
PHOTO Olga Tuponogova-Volkova
Let's be honest: femininity is not too encouraged by the laws of the modern world. Quite the contrary: in order to build a successful career, to survive in a huge city, to take part in a profession, we sometimes have to compete with men on equal terms and show by no means female grip, willpower and perseverance. How to maintain balance in such conditions and not turn into an “iron lady”? It turns out that everything is not so complicated: femininity is a quality that can be not so much developed as “remembered”. Originally laid down in us by nature, it only requires the ability to open up. Try to add at least some of the proposed methods into the habit, and perhaps very soon you will feel how your mood is changing and how harmonious your life becomes.
Ask men for help
This advice is especially useful for independent ladies who are accustomed with their bare hands to "put out the huts" and "stop for the ride" anything, without resorting to male help. Set the rule of daily request for yourself: every day, contact a friend (or stranger) of a man with a request to help you - even if you think that you are quite capable of handling it yourself. Ask to deal with the “frozen” computer, bring a heavy box to a nearby office, pump up a wheel, unload food packages from the trunk and bring them to the apartment - there are plenty of options. Pay attention to your own emotions and the mood of the man who agreed to help you: you will be surprised to find that even strangers will usually be happy for at least five minutes, but to be knights for you - and you, in turn, will surely like to feel a fragile princess who is not shy and not afraid to ask for help and does not seek to shoulder everything.
Oscar de la Renta dress, earrings, ring, everything - RL Jewel
PHOTO Olga Tuponogova-Volkova
Exercise Healthy Selfishness
If there are ladies radiating femininity in your environment, then you must have noticed how they are distinguished by their amazing ability to put their interests first. Neither the family nor the working people are in a hurry to regularly find time for fitness and going to the beautician, they are constantly passionate about something - a new book, an interesting hobby, a premiere in the theater - and fantastically find time and energy for these hobbies. At the same time, they cannot be called narcissistic egoists in any way - strangely enough, neither family nor career suffer from a lack of care, rather, on the contrary: only after charging herself with pleasant impressions, having devoted enough time to her desires, the woman is ready to give attention to the family and fully realize herself in work. Conclusion: learn to please yourself and every day at least briefly pay attention only to yourself. Make a list of what gives you pleasure - it can be listening to your favorite music, walking in the evening city, a fragrant bath or reading a fascinating book. Let this “time for yourself” last only 30-40 minutes a day - but one thing should become your obligatory ritual.
Watch the speech
Just as the manner of speaking reflects our internal state, so we can influence it by correcting our speech. Agree, it is difficult to imagine a feminine girl who is loudly and inconsistently explaining something to the interlocutor, interrupting him now and then and not embarrassed in expressions. Try to speak slowly, do not get carried away with lengthy constructions, limit yourself to short phrases in essence and follow the choice of vocabulary, getting rid of parasitic words. Some psychologists also advise during a conversation to introduce yourself during a conversation with a crown on your head - with the help of such visualization you will naturally master the majestic and feminine style of speech characteristic of royalty.
Creativity, even the most “useless”, is an emotional “battery” for a woman, helping her to maintain femininity and be in harmony with herself. Do not be too lazy to find the time and choose the type of creativity that is close to you - there are a lot of options: it can be needlework, creating websites, drawing, singing, sculpting, scrapbooking, making bouquets or origami. A separate point is to highlight pair dances (remember the film “Let's Dance” with Jay Law, Susan Serendon and Richard Gere): in addition to smooth movements and grace, they teach to trust a partner and give him the role of leader - which means that each dance lesson can be safely considered a mini-dance. training on femininity.
Oscar de la Renta dress, Aquazzura sandals, earrings, ring, all - RL Jewel
PHOTO Olga Tuponogova-Volkova
Redefine Your Style
Feminine looks are not necessarily pastel colors, floor dresses, ruffles and bows. Rather, this ability to look dull and constantly find new shades of the image. If you have been faithful to the same style for years, try experimenting with silhouettes, colors, accessories, and hair. Ideally, of course, the consultation of a professional stylist will not hurt here, but you can completely limit yourself to the advice of friends whose taste you trust. Well, in fairness, dresses and skirts should be given special attention - they really add to the image of femininity.
Maintaining femininity in the frantic rhythm of a big city is very difficult: traffic jams, deadlines, constant rush and chronic sleep deficit successfully bring up self-discipline and multitasking in us, but not femininity. To avoid emotional breakdowns, not to “get black” and not turn into a “man in a skirt”, find at least five minutes a day for simple meditation - even such minimal “nourishment” will help you relax and maintain peace of mind, despite stress and force majeure.
How to become feminine
How to become feminine? A similar question of the development or discovery of their own female manifestations regains its relevance, because being endowed with all the qualities and manifestations of femininity from birth, more and more immersed in social life, a woman loses them or some part. Realities of life almost equalized gender differences and, along with numerous rights, women received additional responsibilities, now they are entering those areas of life that were previously accessible only to men and forced to compete there, under rather harsh conditions. With a constant struggle for survival, the danger of showing one’s own weakness and the need to use male strategies of behavior, a woman gets used to living in this way, and then wonders how to become soft and feminine, and not a hard asexual machine to achieve goals.
Femininity is not acquired in one day or a session in the spa, it is a congenital condition of every woman, everyday care is only to take care of its maintenance or restoration in case of loss. So, if you get to a seminar dedicated to something about femininity and they begin to redraw you there into someone you have never been and are forced to do things that suck energy out of you, and do not nourish you with strength and joy, feel free to leave, because the disclosure laid by nature should not be felt as violence and hard work. The return and care of one’s own femininity in the organic course of events is accompanied by joy, inspiration, a surge of strength and the desire to share such a happy state of oneself, easily striving further.
What is the ideal woman today
How to become feminine and attractive to a beloved man? What is necessary for this to be - affectionate, tender, beautiful externally and internally, charming? We often think about how to become beautiful: to adjust the parameters of the figure to the cherished 90-60-90, dye the hair in a “natural blond”, smooth wrinkles. Of course, all these thoughts and efforts are commendable. But how often do we think about how to become not just beautiful, but how to become a feminine and well-groomed girl?
We develop in ourselves a lot of positive qualities: persistence in achieving goals, courage in mastering extreme sports, responsible attitude to work. But sometimes we’re not particularly keen to learn how to develop femininity in ourselves - perhaps the most important quality bestowed by nature. If you are full of dignity and are in excellent physical shape, it's time to develop femininity in yourself. “Easy Useful” will help you find the answer to the question of how to become more feminine.
What is femininity
It is extremely difficult to give a definition of this concept in a nutshell. If you ask this question to men, many will answer: "This is tenderness, charm, calm gentleness." Women themselves, most likely, will talk about personal care, about fashion and style, about good manners. True femininity evokes emotions and sensations, but to draw her “verbal portrait” is not easy: it creates an aura of inexplicable attractiveness around a woman. What color is this aura? And how to shine with this magical warm glow? How to become feminine?
“Once again about love”
In a conversation about women, the first association is, of course, love: for a lover, spouse, child. But for this feeling to flourish in all its diversity, a woman just needs self-love. To become more feminine and tender, this love must be causeless and sincere. The question “why should I love myself” sounds incorrect: do not confuse self-esteem and appreciation of one’s own achievements and successes with self-love as a human being.
Love yourself for being unique. Such as you were not, never will be. Love yourself as part of a vast beautiful world and as a person who can make this world a better place. Without manifesting your most precious quality - the ability to love - it is impossible to become feminine. And you need to start with yourself, but do not confuse self-love with narcissism. Falling in love is blind, but true love with kind attention will point out the flaws and tell you how to fix them, how to become tender.
The inner world of a woman
Despite the importance of external attractiveness, it is much more important to become tender and feminine. Femininity is, first of all, the self-awareness of a woman in the world, her inner mood. The best helper in this is meditation. Deep relaxation will help you tune in to the right mood. Learn meditation techniques and devote yourself to meditation for at least a few minutes daily.
Use calm beautiful music. Take as a basis phrases that are close to mantras, for example: “I radiate love and receive love”, “I bathe in the generous currents of love.” On their basis, invent your own affirmations (attitudes). And - smile! What better smile reflects harmony and light in the soul? Whatever you are busy with - managing a large company or taking a walk with your baby and preparing dinner - remember: you are the embodiment of love and light. Can such a creature be lethargic and stooped? Of course not!
"Pep, grace and plastic"
You guessed it, this is a quote from a song by Vladimir Vysotsky about gymnastics. If you want to become feminine - do exercises every day and with pleasure. And not just for the sake of the figure: femininity is inseparable from qualities such as grace and grace. Pay particular attention to your posture, movements and gestures. Add simple ballet pas to the set of exercises: this way you will learn to keep your back with laid-back pride. In Latin dances, draw temperament and a touch of temptation, and then your walk will only envy. Take a closer look at the movements of animals and birds: it is not for nothing that the concept of “natural grace” exists. Learn from a graceful cat how to become feminine and desirable.
Watch movies where the actress playing the key character is the standard of femininity. What gestures and in what situations does she use? How appropriate is this? Sign language is very expressive: one or two charming hand movements are necessary in your arsenal.
So, we take all the best from the world of dancing, nature and cinema and adapt for ourselves. Do not copy someone else's charm - invent your own. Because, as the same great Diderot observed:
Without naturalness, there is no true beauty.
“Fashion passes, style remains”
How to become elegant? Whatever the situation requires, an image without a “twist” is boring. But above all, it must be whole. It is not at all necessary to strictly follow fashion - to create a stylish look, individuality is much more important. The following tips will help you become more feminine.
- Maintain the color scheme, combine bright wardrobe items carefully. Focus on nature: flowers are a great example of a harmonious combination of rich shades. If you are not sure, use a duet of pastel and bright colors. Remember: it is easier to use one gamut - cold or warm. Pairs from the category cold pink + warm red are not always successful even for style professionals.
- In the same gamut as the clothes, the make-up must be sustained: in this case, the outfit and visage are emphasized.
- Accessory can become a catchy accent spot. Even in a strict office image there is a place for a small brooch or pendant. Learn to wear hats, kerchiefs, capes and women's ties: they will come in handy for any occasion, help to make the look practical (the stole will warm in the cold) and non-trivial (a ladies' tie is a strict thing, but it will definitely attract attention). Devote an evening to mastering the art of tying neckerchiefs. In cases where jewelry is inappropriate, an elegant scarf or scarf will become that highlight, concise and restrained. But if you really want to, then you can wear jewelry and sports training. The main thing is that they are safe and consistent with the sports style: small earrings or hoop earrings are quite suitable.
- Set up a versatile skirt in the wardrobe - simple and yet elegant. Not pretentious, with catchy finishes, but with a more modest style and high-quality expensive fabric.
- Universal pumps with a small elegant heel are the best choice for everyday life: they don’t have an evening sparkle of stilettos and simplicity of ballet shoes or sneakers.
All these details eloquently reveal your secret: you do not just strive to be well-dressed - you creatively and lovingly create a stylish image. This is the secret of reincarnation. And what could be more feminine than mystery?
Grooming and nurturing yourself
Agree, with taste and to the place, the selected outfit will play only when its owner looks well-groomed. Own feelings work at the subconscious level:
- “Is my skin soft to the touch?” I am attractive! ”
- “Is my hair as soft as silk?” It's nice to touch me! ”
- “Do I have well-groomed nails?” I will not be left without attention! ”
In the modern world, where a woman is not only a spouse and mother, but also often a “financier” of the family, and an “engine of progress”, it is quite difficult to devote time to yourself. But to become feminine and desirable, it is simply necessary. Here are some tips from EasyUseful.
- Follow the regime: a full sleep allows the body to recover. Different regeneration processes occur at different times. Go to bed early: sleep until midnight - "a dream of beauty." It is in these parts that skin cells are actively renewed. Adhering to the regime, you will free up additional time for personal care.
- Combine! Walk on the way to work: a light cardio load will improve your complexion, and when you admire the park or the street, you will smile and will not frown in the crush at rush hour. Try combining meditation with a morning shower or evening bath. While preparing dinner, let the hair mask “work” on the head. To look like a well-groomed girl, to keep warm, wrap a beautiful terry towel on your head with a turban and fasten it with a handkerchief clip. So you will become feminine Scheherazade from "1000 and one night!"
- Everything is good in moderation. Many personal care procedures are not only possible, but also need to be done on different days. A sense of proportion will serve you well in the selection of outfits, and when applying makeup and manicure. Agree, a female vamp using aggressive shades of eyeshadow and lipstick, saturated or very dark colors of nail polishes, looks more vulgar than feminine.
“Let me kiss your pen!”
Dear ladies and ladies, remember: it depends on how you lend a hand to a man whether he will kiss her or shake her. This simple passage clearly demonstrates the importance of gestures. Активная жестикуляция может раздражать собеседника, а её отсутствие – создать о вас впечатление человека холодного. На каждый случай хороши свои жесты и соответствующая манера поведения. Но есть вещи, которым необходимо научиться, чтобы стать элегантной и женственной.For example, how to hold hands when they do not have a purse or a cell phone? How, sitting on the couch, put the legs so that they seem longer? Watch others, analyze movies, read literature on etiquette - it’s not so difficult to develop your system of gestures. Smooth, graceful movements of the hands and well-groomed fingers add to the image of playfulness, flirty.
Voice timbre and manner of speaking
The voice is no less important than gestures. Even in the most difficult, conflict situations, try not to raise your voice. Remember: those who speak quietly are best heard. Sometimes, if, for example, you need help, even notes of self-doubt are acceptable.
Of course, obscene expressions and rude words are unacceptable: they do not fit in with the concepts of tenderness, femininity. Work with your voice: listen to yourself on the record, try attending courses - there are a great many of them, in addition to oratory and stage speech. Practice, rehearse, read love lyrics aloud. Voice is an excellent instrument, one of the most powerful in its effect on people. Master it! Even if you have dozens of people subordinate, try to give instructions, but not give orders in a command tone. Learn to be emotional within the normal range. Thinly and sincerely expressing your emotions is a very feminine tactic.
Strength is in weakness
Time dictates its own laws - we women are used to being strong, independent, even courageous in the struggle for career heights and happy everyday life of households. We’ll have to wean, at least for fun, because, as our old acquaintance Didro said:
We always remain ourselves, although not a minute remains the same.
So, how can a woman show her weakness without pretense?
- Try daily to ask for a small service of familiar men, or even strangers. Pay attention to their reaction: men like to be knights. You will be happy to help and debug a frozen computer, and bring a heavy bag. This will show you the advantages of a feminine manner of behavior, will allow you to enjoy its fruits. It is so nice to feel fragile and surrounded by care!
- Pay attention to self-development, at least 30–40 minutes a day. An interesting woman with a broad outlook causes a desire to communicate. And communication on topics of interest to you is always an occasion for positive emotions, an opportunity to reveal your inner world. Interest in your person will increase self-esteem, and curiosity without tediousness and excessive academicness will add points to your interlocutor.
- Engage in any creativity, needlework. Drawing and painting will help your own stylist in your practice: you will understand the laws of color, light and form. All this comes in handy when choosing feminine new things. And needlework is a primordially feminine way to spend leisure time and to please the family with cute little things. And the nerves are soothing!
The result of hard work on yourself and finding yourself will not take long. A little time will pass, and you will become a real lady: with a proud posture, grace in every movement and a soft voice.
How to become more feminine
A woman usually begins to think about such a situation when she notices a lack of male attention to her own person, and what is more likely to be in the men's team, where she is her boyfriend, partner or competitor, but no one has invited her for a long time . Confronted with reality can cause a trip to visit a friend who is lost and, not knowing how to cope with the simplest tasks (drive a nail or go for groceries on her own). By turning on the analysis, a woman begins to realize that her husband, brothers and unfamiliar men flock to the aid of this lack of courage, and from her, skillfully choosing a drill in a hardware store, on the contrary, they scatter.
If you think about how to become more feminine and tender, take a closer look at your own look, usually it broadcasts a lot about your condition and the habit of making contact. For a cold, prickly and arrogant look that follows every little thing in men, a purely professional or medical interest may arise. Many try to dress up in pink skirts with ruffles, hang around with clinking bracelets and wait for happiness, but femininity is for the most part not only in external manifestations. You can bring yourself to the reference state of cinematic beauty, but as soon as others meet your eyes or hear mentor notes in your voice, the charm of the external mask will be dispelled. Your gestures and gait, manner of conducting a conversation, vocabulary and loudness of voice, touch and sense of tact play a much greater role in the manifestation of femininity.
Femininity is the most important quality that attracts men, and not a sense of humor, erudition and a pumped priest (this is more of a female list of attractive parameters in a man), but to consider that manifestations of a feminine nature are necessary only in male-female relationships is a mistake. This is a set of qualities that helps to build and improve relations in the family (in its global understanding, with all relatives and generations) and the work team. Many people begin to think about how to become soft and feminine when a child appears, because if both parents behave more masculine, then the child simply has nowhere to learn sensitivity, understanding emotions, building communications and many more things that are more developed in women.
To understand how to become more feminine and more tender it is worth identifying the main positions that make up the perception of femininity in the woman herself and those around her. Practically synonymous with femininity in a statistical survey was softness, and softness in everything. This applies to how you present your own gestures, if they are sharp and torn, then the image is far away, and if smooth and fluid, then you are close to ideal. The softness of the touch, warm, almost imperceptible, instead of sudden jolts or unexpected, frightening touch.
The softness of your intonations and voice - if you control how you communicate with people, removing hysterical shrill notes, lowering the timbre and adding velvet, then even harsh criticism will sound soft and enveloping. Softness also refers to what people experience when touching you - warm cashmere, soft silk, well-groomed warm hands immerse you in an atmosphere of light, comfort and warmth. While the skin, metal rivets, icy fingers make you strain and gather, and the inner feeling of such a person is wary and counteracting.
If you feel the loss of connection with your femininity, then join the women's company, in principle, everyone should have it (at least in the minimum version of one girlfriend), since male society will never replace communication with representatives of its gender. Our energy and world-perceiving processes are arranged differently, and when you are in the male environment for a long time, your natural rhythms and paths begin to be reconstructed to less suitable ones. Women's society is restoring the normal functioning of the female psyche, where emotions become more accessible, the observation of many details at the same time, and also the realization of exclusively female needs.
In the female circle, increased communication needs are being met, and shopping will be much more fun with a friend than pulling out the best other for trying on thousands of outfits (well, or what do you like from men that men don’t understand). In addition, you support your gender identity and understand that each situation can be solved by women and men, and looking at your friends and listening to their stories you can learn a lot (for example, how not to nail the kitchen shelf itself).
In behavior, femininity is manifested by cheerfulness and a variety of hobbies, when communicating, openness and willingness to help a person are shown (you can fill in an awkward pause in a conversation in time and the person will be very grateful to you). The feminine girl is in contact with society and is actively involved in his life, showing kindness, care and gentleness. Those. Leave law enforcement officers to swear at the station while you yourself can feed the vagrant. There is an opinion that the feminine vocabulary does not tolerate swear words, but you should not turn into a defenseless sheep - learn to put your opponent in place with a quiet voice and literary epithets (this sounds even more annoying for another, since he immediately raises you several levels higher).
The widespread image of the Vedic woman as the ideal of femininity can lead along the wrong path of perception - smile, please, be silent, endure, but this is not true, even from the point of view of the Vedic concept itself. It says a lot about respect and self-respect, and also that if a person behaves inappropriately with you, then your direct responsibility is to stop this behavior.
A woman is not only softness, it is also passion and fire, a powerful force that can create and destroy. Closing part of one’s energy to seem comfortable is not the way to one’s own femininity. Remember that all your qualities are not just laid down, but you need to learn how to use them, and if you have tremendous power, then direct it to the world, do not tolerate ridicule and threats - give a strong and instant rebuff, showing your teeth. It is such living and real people that attract attention, women who can put a man in his place, become interesting to them, since each person has his borders and limits of permissibility.
How to become elegant and feminine
Elegance is what saves many women in its manifestation in the world, it is always relevant, always appropriate, emphasizes femininity and does not go out of fashion. The basis of any elegance is simplicity and taste, as far as appearance is concerned, it is impeccable compliance with personal hygiene and maintaining the health of the body, neatness (excessive length of nails and hair in different parts of the body can skew the image, subject to all other recommendations). Observe moderation in makeup - its main function should be to adjust skin tone, all other colors can correct imperfections, being in a neutral nude range, the exception is evening images or for special occasions, then you can add a bright accent (adhering to the principle of moderation - or eyes or lips).
Elegance is a quality that concerns everything, so when choosing a perfume, stop at one original representative of a perfume house, instead of a dozen bottles of fakes or cheap colognes sold in transitions. The same is true for jewelry - some laconic platinum earrings are better than a whole cabinet of cheap jewelry.
As for clothes, it should emphasize your dignity, be comfortable and reflect your inner style. If you have a lot of location changes per day, and you try to travel on white stilettos, it will look ridiculous. Always choose what is appropriate for the situation and your life. Naturally, clothes should not be worn, full of holes or dirty, but there is no need to buy everything in expensive boutiques. Adding your own style, it may turn out that the most comfortable shirt made of natural fabrics is sold in a nearby handmade store.
If you don’t know what to choose, give preference to the classics and if you don’t sew clothes to order, adjust it to fit your length and tucks, volume and flare (the figures are different, but the factory one was patterned, so spending a little time on fitting clothes, you get perfect the thing sitting on you).
Classic colors and natural fabrics look expensive and elegant, in addition, they are successfully combined with each other, so you get a universal wardrobe. Between the choice to wear something or not, always choose a smaller quantity - simplicity is the basis of elegance, and an image overloaded with details is more characteristic of boho-chic than of classical elegance.
But only in external manifestations feminine elegance does not end, but rather manifests itself, the main aspect concerns behavior and manners. Pay attention to your own speech, which should not only sound soft and muffled, but also be grammatically correct, beautifully built and excluding obscene expressions. Spoken and slang words, parasitic words, incorrect stresses will spoil any image.
The ability to create a pleasant atmosphere around and to show ease is a virtue of elegance. The ability to win over people, find common topics (by the way, they can be prepared in advance) and remain calm in any situations - are gained through training. A polite attitude to people (regardless of their status and your personal relationships) and observance of social norms are not only manifestations of etiquette knowledge, but also characterize the person’s internal intelligence. Ease and unobtrusiveness, restraint and confidence, endurance and dignity are common features of elegance and femininity.